Distant Land (part 9)


It was a week later that the Brian Talbot made planet fall. The world in question was uncharted and appeared to have a surface that was entirely mechanized…

It also appeared to be radio-silent. So, being a nosy bunch of silicon life-forms, the crew cheerfully decided to investigate. As the ship entered orbit, a saucer-shaped landing craft launched from it…

…and went very fast indeed…

…before racing across the strange metallic world’s surface at high altitude…

…and sweeping down…

…to deposit two members of a very small landing party…

“Flipping heck, Placebo,” Folie complained, “our first visit to an alien world; and it has to be a frozen one!”

“Yeah.” Placebo replied glumly. “Someone must have run out of energy: this whole planet is dead.”

They proceeded to discover an aqueduct that was entirely empty of flowing water…

“Ooh,” Placebo opined, “this is so depressing.”

Folie agreed. “And boring too.” He added. “I think I hate dead worlds.”

This level of conversation continued for the next two hours – until they received a call that informed them the Landing Craft was returning…

“Ah-hah.” Placebo cheered. “Our first, and extremely dull, adventure is about to end!”

And he wasn’t wrong. Very soon the Brian Talbot was breaking orbit…

Inside the vast craft, Folie and Placebo watched the mechanized world fall behind as the Brian Talbot accelerated away…

“Cripes, Folie.” A relieved Placebo said. “That was the dullest episode in my life – certainly since the day I got accidentally locked in the Ladies loo whilst drunk on a overseas seminar in my final year at university. I was later diagnosed with Post Lavatorial Traumatic Syndrome and had to be slapped around the face for several minutes by my tutor.”

“How awful.” Folie lamented. “It reminds me of the whole day that I spent with my underpants on back-to-front. I was so confused, I can tell you. I’ve never dressed in the dark since.”

“Awesome.” Placebo replied breathlessly. “Just awesome.”

© Paul Trevor Nolan 2019

 

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