Junior Earplug Adventures: Winning Numbers (Part Thirty-Nine)

The entertainment centre of the K T Woo had seldom been used. When Sinclair and Nancy visited it, they found the backdrop in disarray and several electrical fittings in need of repair. But that didn’t douse their passion or dampen their enthusiasm…

“Oh, Sinclair,” Nancy gushed, “it’s going to be wonderful. And to think; we have all the musical backing tracks in our library that Margret Greenhorn has asked for. With a professional dance act on board we can’t fail.”

It was just at that moment that it was fortunate that the entire crew had volunteered to prepare the show and that no one had remained behind on the bridge,because the inhabitants of the alien ship decided to take a closer look at the inert K T Woo…

But even without the problem of an enemy closing upon them, the earplugs aboard the ship managed to create enough for themselves to worry about…

Margret rushed up to the captain, his wife, and the First Officer.

“Captain Brooch.” She said in a most reproachful voice. “I’ve just been taking a look at the talent aboard your ship. Sadly I have to report there is none. There’s no one left to take auditions. My girls can dance and have some real winning numbers in their repertoire; but they can’t sing. If we don’t find some more acts in the next five minutes, we won’t have a show.”

“Oh, Sinclair,” Nancy stammered, “if we don’t have a show, we won’t have a ship left to carry us home. Be a captain: do something!”

For once Sinclair Brooch was ahead of the game. “I’ve been spying on the locker rooms and shower units.” He confided. “For several months actually. And I’ve drawn the conclusion that my crew are tone-deaf; useless jugglers; and wouldn’t know a joke if it kicked them up the arse. But worry not; the crew are not the only people aboard the K T Woo.”

He then snapped his fingers. A moment later a door opened and in walked…

…the lottery winners. Hamish was their spokesperson:

“Captain,” he said, “I’ve done as you said. I’ve auditioned the lottery winners; and I can tell you this: Vera Glovebox has a lovely contralto and can bellow her way through an aria or two with the best of ’em. Jed Perkins is natural comedian: he’d have to be – walking about in the wilds, like he does, all by himself, with nothing but the grass and sky to entertain him. Don Quibonki is a fantasist and a teller of tall tales – some of which might actually be true. His sidekick, Panta Lonez, has a charming smile. Charles and Wolfgang are magicians at fixing machinery: I’m sure they can put on a show of manual dexterity. And talking of manual dexterity: Erroneous Bosche and Hellfire McWilliams have agreed to show us all how to be great pick-pockets. Whadda ya think?”

“I think,” Margret said, as she cast an appraising eye over the performers, “that I wish we had some rehearsal time. But we don’t. Okay, everyone down to costumes and make-up.”

At that time no one within the vast ship of space had realised that they had been boarded…

So no one witnessed the passing of two interlopers and a pet plugmutt. They certainly weren’t aware that those same two interlopers had entered the bridge…

“Crikey.” Chester exclaimed. “Look at the dust in here. This bridge appears to have been abandoned.” Then he noticed the bridge toilet. “It’s been a long time since breakfast.” He said. “And I haven’t ‘been’ yet today. Would you mind awfully looking the other way?”

Naturally Onlie didn’t mind one bit. In fact she insisted…

Then she had an idea. “Hey,” she cried as she fought the impulse to turn around, “let’s see if we can access the captain’s log.”

“Yeah, good idea.” Chester grunted. “Just as soon as I’ve accessed mine.”

© Paul Trevor Nolan 2018



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